I did not know what my show was about until I finished the last painting. It is a story of Death to Life. I thought I was doing a show about angels but that quickly gave way to death to life. Instead of depressing it gives me joy to see how this unfolded.
And it did unfold on a lot of levels. It was a game changer.
Art is never static. It breathes. It does not keep secrets.
It tells the truth.
The paintings I did before were outside looking in and these are inside looking out. This is the most personal show I have ever done and I think the best.
You have to grow in anything you do or you start to die.
this show is about death and life and how it is necessary for one to have the other. Even if circumstances look different they are dramatically dependent on each other to be. What we all have in common are these two things. Life and Death. and that is what this show is about.
Leaving reality behind and going to the place where there are no guidelines or clues or ideas is scary. It is easier to get a plan and execute it. Just do it, it is right there.
No staring at a white canvas and say speak to me… is harder. You just have to start and see where it goes. Let the first line tell you what the next line will be.
How do you correct a line that is just random??? You have to see it. How do you see it. This is how. When it stops making you sick and starts making you feel settled then it is there that you stop. Writing , or anything really is this but they only way to find it is to start looking and you can’t start looking till you are in process.
My Web master is going hiking a lot. I am sure he did not know what he would find till he started going on that first hike. Then the next , then the next. It is an abstract thing too. one foot in front of another. It is a faith thing that you aren’t just wasting time. You aren’t . More than getting there is all you find on the way.
Painting, walking, writing, . really who cares about the end when the journey is the main deal. Finishing just means get on to the next first step into the unknown.
Artwork should unfold. You should not be able to take it all in immediately. It should keep talking to you. It should say volumes over the years not just one thing. Thats why you can look at the same masterpiece at a museum and see new things each time you see it. Art has infinity written in the body. Infinity is well, infinite. It is not about you. It is about infinity. If you do the work out of skill it won’t go on forever. I am a firm believer that you should paint more than you know how to do. It is not about great you can crank a work out and sometimes skill gets in the way. You depend on yourself too much.
My mom got a new couch. She loved how it looked in her front room. She called me up all excited because it felt so fresh and alive. I agreed with her. I loved it too.
Then other people saw it and did not go crazy when they saw it. They just said oh . And then like a bomb went off in her brain. All enjoyment of her new couch was killed. Now she said it was too big and not that great and flaw city,
My Mom was right to be thrilled about her couch , she needed that change to move on after Dad. Little as it seems, moving things around does give you a fresh perspective.
I am writing this to show you how immediately you can change someones life, This is true straight across the board.
Here is reality. New things need time to adjust to. You are expecting something else and your eye has to adjust. Your brain has to adjust.
about art. buy art that makes you work a little. Art should always make you work a little to see it. When you do it is worth the effort. Easy pretty does not last.
When I did the angel painting, I did not know it would usher me into another thing. Two angels sitting calmly reassuring me that what was coming next would be ok. My Dad was still alive when I painted them. So it made sense to do a show of angels because that was real. But after he died and all the grief started I sort of avoided painting because I did not want to do a bunch of sad paintings.
It was mercy that I had to get this show done so I had to start at some point. so in December I wrestled with several angel girls that did not speak to me at all . I actually had this repulsion to them which was weird.
I got this urge to just do some black and white paintings and then they were abstracts. I loved painting them and I love looking at them. Maybe they look dark and dreary to someone else but to me they are so soothing and warming and life affirming to me.
an artist has to paint what is real to them or it will have no lasting affect.
Life is not a cartoon where everything is predictable and easy to understand. It is textured and deep and lovely in all the time we have. This is what I am painting for a time. These are new and it is a total risk for the gallery to show something totally new when people expect a certain look from me, but my gallery owner is brave and she is showing them.
I asked myself if I had a year to live what would I paint and this is it. Who knows how long a person has. You have to do the deep things when they come, not wait for the luxury of acceptance . That is what art is.
I read another blog and the artist said that if your work is loved by all then you aren’t taking enough risks. this is one time where better safe than sorry is not applicable.