Its sort of mind boggling to read about the lives of Saints. Especially ones that have still a huge influence of people thousands of years after they lived. St. Anthony was born wealthy and heard a priest quote one line in the Bible. “Give everything you have away, and follow me” So he did. He gave all his possessions away to the poor and went to live in a cave in the desert for 43 years. You would think that was a little bit overboard but he was led to do that . Others joined him and he started the first monastery. What do you do in a monastery ?? pray. He had some pretty scary things occur while in the cave. Demonic activity manifested in the cave but he remained resolute. He thought he must be doing something right if demons were attacking him. The monastery he started is still there today. It has two churches full of art that was painting on the walls. This is shy of two thousand years ago and its still there. You can even go to the actual cave he lived in.
I painted him simply holding the Christ child in his arms. I don’t think he’d mind the sequins as Im sure he experienced inner light in the cave and reflected off him. t
Remember Me is a painting that happened because of a look in her eye when I was in the middle of painting. It reminded me of when you think back wistfully about someone that you loved and now they are gone. It is sort of a little pain and sweetness all at the same time. You wonder if they still remember you and the time you had. I was thinking how that feeling is kind of awful and wonderful. at the same time.
This painting is about the past. She is thinking of a long time ago , but it still is fresh. You, everyone has had that experience. sweet and sour at the same time.
I feel compelled to tell you about the “Roses in January” painting. I did it in a fit of needing to be in a garden and needed to feel the sun on my face and smell the sweet scent of roses.
Deep in January is the coldest time in the world here and the most depressing for me. I have to escape into my work and get what I need there. I need gold and roses and warmth and stunning color to get through this month.
The woman is full and rich and determined and focused on what she needs to be focused on. She is making every wish she has come true . She will get me through this month and this winter . Imagine finding full bloom roses in the snow, Imagine how heavenly they would smell juxtaposed against the cold. Their hot breath melting the snow.
I was working in the studio the other day and this little thing caught my eye. That little thing became a whole painting. Even though I usually start from something bigger than a little fluff and a slight curve of a lip, It is not necessarily better to start more prepared. A little fluff and a shadow became copper girl and I really love her. In fact she might be my favorite of the whole show.
There was this dictionary word for today which was
Autoschediastical aw-toh-SKEE-dee-az-tik-uhl, adjective: Something improvised or extemporized.
When paintings get born from this beginning then it is usually the best work you ever do. Plan Plan Plan. Then don’t plan and just go.
Every show has a point where you are painting and painting then you see what the show wants to be. This is the pivotal point. You may have to go back and make the other paintings get into line with the pivotal one/ In fact you should. The pivot is the turning to what makes sense and is yet another layer of growth.
Every show has to be better and better. You cannot just do the same thing over and over. This show I am working on reached the pivot and the pinnacle yesterday, quite unexpectedly. I thought I was doing okay and the show was jiving. Then I did this one and forget it — everything else must bow down to the one I did yesterday.
Let me tell you what is great about this painting. That I see, right now. It is simple and perfect and big and interesting and simple and one idea and lovely and simple and simple. The hardest paintings to paint are the simple ones. The lines have to carry the whole thing and they must do it with grace and power. After I finished the painting reclining woman with silver , I knew I had found the secret of the universe in those eyes and that curve of her breast. It was simply perfect. And I Painted it without any awareness of myself.
When you are in that space it is effortless. But and this is a big but. every year and paintstroke was leading to this moment in time. It was leading to his second when she took flight and declared loud and clear. This is your show!
Hanging in the gallery