When someone is going through a hard stressful time, people don’t know what to do. They say things like they are praying for you or thinking of you or call me if you need anything. I have done all these things too because I did not know what is the most necessary thing.
Now I do know. My friends left me some flowers in my doorway. I came home after having a traumatic almost dying occurrence with my Dad . He was leaving and we were all around the bed crying and saying we loved him and it lasted for half and hour and he almost stopped breathing. Then he asked for a piece of chocolate. So it goes on… the waiting. But it was an emotionally exhausting experience and I am glad we were all there but still it was tough. We came home to find flowers in the door and it felt like someone knew how this was going. Like I was not alone.
that is what people need in times of trial. to not be alone. You don’t have to say anything profound but just come over and stand next to the grieving . Do ask if there is anything to do because nobody wants to bother you, just do something like send a note or make a sandwich or a cup of tea. No words are necessary no questions are necessary. The only thing that helps is having our friends stand by us .
Now I know what to do when someone else is in this place.